Building Your Trust

It takes a lot of trust in your man to submit your life to him. He must have the ability to lead with wisdom. This is a big ask of the man, it puts a lot of responsibility onto him, so you must be sure he is up to his role. It is very important that you work out this dynamic before you marry.

Firstly, and very importantly, you are not the same and you should not try to be the same. Each of you has a role to play that creates marriage bliss. His role as head of the household is to love, protect and provide with total devotion to your every need. His role is to faithfully serve you. Your role as a wife is to love, care and obey with total devotion to his every need. Your role is to faithfully love him. In your heart there is burning love, in his head is the power to protect and provide.

So how do you build this level of trust? Firstly start as you mean to continue. By understanding his role you can adopt the correct behavior that reinforces your life together in the long term.

Here are some practical steps:

Ask his opinion on absolutely every decision in your life, no matter how small. By inviting his input into the detail of your life you will gain a close bond. If you disagree with his opinion you must resolve the outstanding matter in a very quiet, polite, feminine way. If he still sticks to his opinion after you put forward your point of view, then you must obey. From this you can judge the quality of his decisions especially in the area of acting in your best interest.

Seek his assistance with anything that is at all masculine. Never change a wheel on the car; this is not girl’s work, so call him. You must be feminine at all times to give him the opportunity to show you that he can be trusted to look after you. If you do these things yourself how is he to establish his role as your provider and protector. This is very important!

When there is any event out of the ordinary or any major decision in your life you must ask for his approval. This is different from minor things where his opinion is sort. For example, you wish to visit a friend in another city. You can not just up a leave, or just inform him that you are off, you must have his complete approval. Each time his gives his permission it helps in a number of ways. You show your devotion to him. His trust in you is increased, provided that you behave to a high standard. It helps set the boundaries of what he finds acceptable behavior by you. In practice he will virtually never withhold his permission and if his does it will be for a very good reason. If he does not grant you permission then you must obey.

Do not pay for anything. His role is to provide for you. When you are married or when the first child is born you will not work again in your life. Therefore start now, when you are together he must provide everything. You need to make it clear that you expect to be kept to a high standard once you are married. In return you will have the time and energy to be a devoted wife. This will give you the time to keep yourself in shape and attend to the smooth running of the household plus pursue interests of your own (learn the piano; do charity work or what ever you are interested in).

He must clearly understand his role before you marry, which is to be devoted to you. You must allow him to fulfill his role by seeking his protection and expecting him to provide for you. Only if he lives up to his role should you marry him. A weak man is curse that you do not want to bring into your life.